What this site is about:
This site a no holds barred, blunt approach to the American epidemic of obesity.
It is offensive, crass and barbaric, but more importantly it is the exact type of “in your face” honesty that is missing from the life of most overweight people. This site is not here to make you feel bad, or to make fun of you. This site is here to open your eyes to how obvious your problem is, and how easy it is to fix.
If you are overweight, you can do one of two things:
1) Be offended, hit the back button now, and go cry yourself in to a tub of ice cream
2) Read this page, laugh at the bluntness and choose to change your life TODAY!
If you take offense to anything you read on this site, there has to be a reason why ( a reason deeper than the excuse you tell yourself as you curse my name). If the shoe fits, wear it, change it, and start wearing new shoes. If the shoe doesn’t fit, then you should not take offense at all.
Think you can handle the unfortunate, brutal, and 100% reversable truth?
Read on if you dare!
Let’s just start with that. You don’t have a weight problem, you have an eating problem!!
If you’re fat, you’re eating too much damn food. Period. It’s not your parent’s fault for giving you the “fat” gene. It may be their fault that they made you like food so much, but for once in your fat life let’s stop blaming other people, OK?
But I can hear you whining already, like you always do. You don’t *really* eat much, right? You might even go so far as to say “But, I only eat salad”. Yes, I’ve heard that before. SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU FAT LIAR!! Guess what, “salad” didn’t come inside those Big Mac wrappers in your back seat. All 25 of them. You fucking lying piece of shit, you eat a salad in front of everyone when you go out to lunch and act like you’re eating healthy then you go home and down a quart of ice cream after your fried chicken.
If this relationship is going to work, you need to be truthful to not only me, but yourself. Look in the mirror right now and say, “I am a big fatbody because I eat too much damn food.” There. Now we can move on.
Yes, you want to be fat. If I woke up tomorrow suddenly as fat as you, what do you think my reaction would be? Do you think I would say “Aww, wahh I’m fat, I sure wish I could lose weight” and then go eat three Big Macs and a diet Coke? You bet your fat ass I wouldn’t, I would be working like hell to get rid of the disgusting fat. I guarantee you that if through some weird science experiment my brain was placed in your fat fucking body I would be fit and running a marathon within a year.
But you, no, you’re doing nothing, are you? Your “salad” for lunch and diet Coke with your fried chicken is all for show. They require no effort. Yet you want credit for it, don’t you? And you want people to think “Well damn, that fat fucker must be fat because of their unfortunate genes, I saw them drink Diet Coke yet they’re still fat!! That’s too bad.” But nobody thinks that, everyone knows why you’ve got more rolls than a sushi restaurant.
This is actually something I find extremely offensive, when fat people chide me for watching my diet. “Oh, you don’t have to worry about your weight!” they’ll say to me if I turn down sweets or extra portions. Guess what you fucking fatty, I’m not fat BECAUSE I “worry about my weight”. I ran 20 miles this week. I made a healthy lunch and brought it to work every day. What did you do? Oh, you sat on your ass and stuffed your mouth full of food, that’s right. And then you have the nerve to tell me that I’m fit because I got lucky.
When my body fat percent goes up a couple percentage points I adjust my diet. That way I always stay where I want to be. It’s like balancing your checkbook. If you just write checks willynilly you’re going to overdraw your account. You’re doing the same thing by paying no attention to how much weight you’re packing on while eating whatever you want. Don’t fuck yourself up by your own doing then discount my own hard work. It’s insulting.
Yes, the human body was meant to move. Sitting on your ass all day isn’t helping matters. Don’t give me any crap about “But! I don’t want to kill myself at the gym!” Oh I see. Would you like to go hiking? Biking? Skiing? Play sports? Or would that kill you too? If so, you’re going to die on the couch. Living life like our bodies intended isn’t making the rest of us fall down and croak.
Did you ever buy any “workout” equipment advertised on late night TV? How about miracle diet pills? Got a Thigh-Master in your closet? Or some stupid little gizmo that’s supposed to help you do crunches and tone your abs? You do? You know why you have that? Because you’re a FUCKING idiot, that’s why!!!
Because you’re afraid of hard work and actual self-discipline, you tried the easy way out, and made someone else richer because of it. None of that crap works, but it’s easy to sell. Why? Because stupid people buy that shit. And who are they marketing to? Fat asses. And why are they fat asses? Because they’re stupid. Case closed. You fatties buy the stupidest stuff, your heads must be shoved deep inside your fat asses. Stop buying stupid shit!!!
Do you know how many fat people have a thyroid problem? Less than 1%. Unless you’ve gone to the doctor and he told you that you have a thyroid problem then the problem is not your thyroid, it’s your hands shoveling food into your fat fucking mouth, that’s what the problem is.
If the problem is your thyroid, then your doctor will treat it and it will no longer be an excuse anyway. The way I see it, if you really were concerned with your thyroid, you would go get it checked out! If you refuse, all it does is further illustrate my point above, that you are fat because you want to be. If you honestly thought it was your thyroid, you would in the doctors office faster than your fat fucking friends can plow down an oreo cookie blizzard. Instead, you prefer to use your thyroid as an excuse so that you can keep eating garbage all day and stay nice a (un)comfortable in the fat, lazy victim role you have been playing your entire life!
Are you fucking kidding me? Is there some relationship between the bones inside your body and the fat rolls on the outside? No there isn’t. The fact that I can’t tell where your neck ends and your face begins is because of fat, not “big bones”. You don’t have bones over your abdomen, you have fat rolls. Seriously, can you even feel any of your bones?
Look at the x-ray pictures on the right. Does the fat person have big bones? No, they fucking don’t. They have fat. I’ve even heard some fatties say they have “thick skin”. Are you really that stupid? Skin isn’t three inches thick.
Oh wait, your argument is that your “big frame” naturally has large muscles on top of those big bones, so you’ll never be able to be as thin as those “rail thin models”, right? This is an interesting mental problem with fatties. “If I can’t be *that* thin, I’ll just be REALLY fat instead!!” Does that make any fucking sense at all??
Guess what, no matter how much lean body mass you have, you’ll still look good without fat covering it. Even if you really do have more bone and muscle, it in no way causes you to carry more fat. If this were true bodybuilding would be impossible because all those men and women (many of them “big boned”, as those people can build more muscle mass) would be big fatasses.
“I have curves!” No, you fucking don’t!! Fat rolls do not equal “curves”. A woman with curves has nice lines that taper down to a slim waist, hips that curve out nicely and shapely legs. Just because you have a big wide ass doesn’t mean you have “curves”, especially if you look like the Michelin Man. If your gut is hanging over your belt, that’s not a “curve”, that’s disgusting.